BIG HUGE GROWN-ASS GIVEAWAY 2017

CAMPERS! It’s time for our annual BIG HUGE GROWN-ASS GIVEAWAY! No, we are not raffling one of you off (don’t tempt us)…but we ARE giving one of you one huge gob of goodies!

Many of our BFF Sponsors donated some pretty kickass gifts, and we have compiled them into the ultimate grab bag worth an estimated $1500. (EHRMAGERD) One October 2017 has the chance to walk away with them all! Here’s just a glimpse of what’s included…

Toys from Love Shack Boutique

Basket of goodies from No. 9 Floral & Gifts

2 night stay at Texas Bell Glamping

Session with Heart to Hands Healing Touch

Makeup Bag & koozies from Bird & Pear

Craft Cruiser ticket’s from She’s Crafty Podcast

Custom greeting cards from The Ink Flamingo

Basket of goodies from Feliz Modern

Custom made basket from Happily Ever Baskets

Lipsense from Jana Evans

You’ll also have some things thrown in your swag bag including goodies from From Scratch Farm, 2tarts Bakery!

Now the deets on how to win. We are using “Viralsweep.” You have multiple ways to earn entries, and the winner will be chosen at random. The contest closes Thursday October 5th at 12pm CST, and winner will be announced at camp on Saturday October 7th. If the winner is attending the first weekend we will give them their prize then. If the winner is attending the second weekend, we will not reveal their identity until the second weekend, and will give them their prize then!

Make sure to tell your BFF Sponsors HAYYY from CDA!

GOOD LUCK!

CLICK HERE TO ENTER!

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5 Things To Put On Your Body That You Didn’t Even Know Existed

STAHP. Put away the baby oil and BBW “Sweet Pea” scented lotion. You’re a grown ass woman and your bootylicious body needs some “next level ish” for sexy time. We found the most amaze-tits stuff we never even knew EXISTED over at Love Shack Boutique!

Master Series Jizz Scented Lube

WHAT THE WHAT? Okay I know Jizz in a bottle sounds like something you would find in a creeper’s closet, but ummm obvi it’s not! This totes sounds like a way to make a deal. No, you can’t put “that” on my tits, but you can put “this!”

Climax Burst Tingling Water Based Lube 

When have you ever heard someone say, “No thanks, I don’t like warm tingly sensations.” That’s what I thought.

Tighten-Up Shrink Cream 

We’re pretty sure this is what Madonna was talking about.

Cosmic Bear Glow in the Dark Lube 

When I think about you I touch myself…in the dark…with glow in the dark lube…like I’m at a rave…but I’m not…I’m in my room eating a burrito…because I only need one hand.

Boobs-a-licious Nipple Cream

Why, THANK YOU. I take very good care of them.

GIRL BOSS | GIRL CRUSH

All our friends seem to be bad bad bishes. What can we say?! We obsess over our GIRL BOSS friends. Don’t have any? Feel free to stalk ours…

April & Ashley of 2tarts Bakery

Misha of Uncommonly Good Biz

I do like how my unbrushed morning hair looks. Very rock star.

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Liz of Bird & Pear

Amy of Love Shack Boutique

Kelli of The The Cosmo Camper

Happy Anniversary to these two teepee enthusiasts! #teepeelovers

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Leslie of The Texas Bell Glamping

Amy of From Scratch Farm

Who doesn't love coming home to their chickens?!

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Ginger of Feliz Modern

 

Susie of Free Rose Studio

Catherine of She’s Crafty Podcast

 

 

 

I Totes Love My Pet and Totes Love Yours Too

GIRL.

We know you get psycho love-buggy over some fur and feather babies. OMG us too. We psycho stalk all of our BFF Sponsors because we’re a little bit (okay kind of a lot) in love with them and their presh pets. Wanna love them just as much as we do? Read below…and check out the end of this post on how to help pets affected by Harvey! (<—asshole)

pepper (No. 9 Floral – Chocolates – Gifts)

Name: Pepper Mache
Age/Breed: 6 year old Pug
Likes: silence, anything deep fried, that calming sensation when her nippy titties hit a cold pillow (GIRL WE RELATE)
Dislikes: Morgan Freeman’s freckles, traffic jams, blackheads, lettuce, personal trainer instagram feeds, small talk, loose change,
Dream Job: Asian Empress, ultimately she wants a window ledge, a coiffed wig and a chance to address a crowd like  Eva Peron…but in Asia, because she is Chinese.
Favorite Movie or TV Show: Babe & The Exorcist

scooby (FROM SCRATCH FARM)

This is Scooby. He’s a sun conure that we adopted in January.

He is super fun, cute, social, and LOUD.  (really loud when people ring the doorbell!)

He’s just about every color of the rainbow.

His hatch-day was in June of 2015.  To celebrate when he turned 2, he got his very own mini churro cupcake, that my younger son decorated in bird seed. (We want a churro cupcake!) Sun conures could live over 20 years, so he’ll be with us for a while!

They can learn to whistle certain songs.  And they can learn to say words.  But we haven’t heard Scooby whistle or say anything cool yet. There is one awesome things that he has learned.  He’ll poop on command!  No joke!  If you hold him on your finger over a paper towel or sink… and tell him to poop… he’ll do it!!!!!

His favorite thing is his roadrunner dog toy that I secured in his cage.

He’ll eat anything from your hand that he’s heard you crunching on (peanuts, chips, popcorn, or crackers).  But if you get near him with other types of food, forget it.  Try to feed him a piece of fruit that sun conures are supposed to love… and he runs the other direction, like it’s going to burn him!  😉

He hangs out with us all the time, especially when we’re sitting outside on the patio.

He watched “Paulie” with me the other day.

He loves splashing in his water dish.

I’ll stop rambling.  😉

diego (2tarts BAKERY)

Name: Diego aka #diegocheddarbiscuits (he has his own hashtag; look it up)
Age/Breed: 6 year old Orange Short Hair Tabby
Likes: making biscuits, taking naps on fresh laundry, hunting moths, and posing for photos while listening to jazz. (GIRL, the jazz? Replacing BFF pronto)
Dislikes: meetings before 9am, arrogant mocking birds, talk radio, sharing food and the patriarchy.
Dream Job: Sushi Chef or Fashion Model
Favorite movie or tv show: Aristocats and Ru Paul’s Drag Race

lend a helping hoof!

Tons of animals have been displaced during Hurricane Harvey. Many people with pets have no home to go back to. Many victims of Harvey don’t have the funds right now to feed their pets. YOU CAN HELP! DaisyCares is a non-profit in San Antonio created to provide pet food, medical care to needy pets. Join us and DONATE HERE!

 

 

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What Does Your Beer Choice Say About You?

Treat-Yo-Desk (7)

Was anyone else a magazine junkie like me when you were a teen? I LOVED mags like Seventeen, Teen Vogue, Cosmo Girl…you know, the super informative high brow shit.

WHAT-EVER.

I was all about the horoscopes, fashion spreads, embarrassing stories and THE QUIZZES. I have no clue why I thought those things were true, but I held on to every damn word. Pretty sure I even convinced myself one time to start a band because I liked chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and beach vacations. What the?

Well we’ve gotten older, but we still haven’t given up on dumb shit like that. So here it is…what does your beer choice say about your personality? Here’s the 411 on your 512 brews

IPA: 7% ABV

“Smooth bitterness with with medium maltiness”

You’re super trendy. You’re totally hip. You’re with it WOMAN. You follow all your fave fashion girls on Instagram and directly purchase your outfits from their posts. Who the hell has time to go shopping? And besides, if it looks good on them, it’ll sure as hell look good on you.


Double IPA: 9% ABV

“Solid malt backbone with smooth bitterness”

Trends? You don’t need no stinking trends. You set them. Flare jeans making a comeback? You’ve been wearing them since 99’. Spinners? Have you seen me twirl my pen in my fingers? Been there, done that. You’re hardly amused. You just don’t do “basic bitch”…like, at all.

WIT: 5.1% ABV

“Light, crisp ale, well suited for any occasion”

Happy hour? I’m there. Sunday Funday? Count me in. You’re the girl everyone calls to have a good time. Not the phone number in the bathroom good time…well, unless you’re into that stuff. No judgment here! You do you boo.


Smash 5.3% ABV

“Very little, if any, malt sweetness and bright fruity hops”

You’re the girl next door. You’re sweet as freaking pie. You’re the friend that everyone wished they could have, but they can’t because people suck and don’t deserve you. Duh.


Pecan Porter: 6.8% ABV

“Full body and malty sweetness balanced with subtle pecan aroma”

Black and sweet, just like your soul. On the outside there’s almost always a rough exterior. Resting bitch face spreads from ear to ear, but on the inside there’s a sweet spot full of yummy goodness. (only your best besties get to see)

Which beer are you??

Peace, Love & Camp!

What to Buy Your Bestie That Went and Got All Pregnant

New job? Here’s some alcohol.

Another birthday? Here’s some alcohol.

Successfully bounced from a hellish first date? Here’s some alcohol.

You don’t have to worry if it fits, and she doesn’t care if she already has the same thing at home. Why? Ummm, it’s alcohol. It’s the perfect gift. It has, does and will ALWAYS work.

Until that bitch gets pregnant.

Whaddya mean pineapple infused vodka is a no-go while you’re making a human? Ugh.

Well it’s time to think outside the wine box. Looks like for the next 9 months you’re gonna have to gift your bestie with something other than a 6 pack. Here’s some of our fave ideas:

1. FLOWERS

She’s gonna be like way extra hormonal. You know when you’re PMSing super hard and you want to murder people and sob uncontrollably when there’s not enough cilantro in your taco? Ya, pregger people are like that but on LSD. Get that baby maker some flowers. Deliver them to her work so she feels extra fucking special too. Don’t get her some sort of basic grocery store or 1-800-BULLSHIT, go get her some brag-worthy creation at No 9 Floral –  Chocolates – Gifts. Who wouldn’t want something as ridiculously pretty as this in their face?

Thank You retail

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2. TREATS

Pregnant bitches love snacks. I mean I’m not even pregnant and I am in a legit serious relationship with snacks. We’ve made it to second base. (Don’t ask) GIRL get her something that’s ridiculous cute and super fucking yummy. Okay, so basically I’ve described everything at 2tarts Bakery. Look at these cookies. OMG! You can give her something that tricks her into thinking you’re excited about her baby AND she can stick them all in her purse and binge eat them later when she’s freaking out about saving for college.

3. ACCESSORIES

Even though you think she’s adorable AF with her baby belly, she’s not always going to feel that way. You’re going to think she looks like Beyonce doing magical baby flips under the water in a sea of chiffon…BUT she’s gonna feel like fat Val Kilmer dipped in mayo. Get her something to pair up with her preggo-wear that makes her feel as gorgeous as you see her. Something super bright and fun is ALWAYS perfect and can ALWAYS be found at Bird & Pear. These cuffs are everything your greasy Val pal could ever want:

4. BEER

Oh we know we typed beer. Girl, this is when you just “fake it to take it.” Oh, you accidentally brought booze to the baby shower? Oooops guess you’ll just have to take that growler of 512 Pecan Porter home and enjoy it by yourself. Oh I’m so sorry. Can’t wait to meet the baby though.

 

Truly Living the Happy Camper Life

We’ve discovered over the years that we attract a certain type of woman at camp. They all happen to have this one thing in common…this similar trait.

We freaking LOVE them.

Our campers come from all over, have all different personalities, and introduce us to so many amazing things. We literally fall in love with them year after year. Today we’re girl crushing on Amy, owner and creative genius behind From Scratch Farm.

Although we go CRAY over Amy’s goodies like her Healing Salve, Lip Balms, and sent from what can only be some sort of magical birthday suit loving realm itself Body Scrub…today we’re LEGIT crushing over her new vintage camper, Betty The Wandering Can.”

Amy purchased Betty from her owner this past July and is giving her the ultimate makeover. She’s started documenting her process and travels  and we are SO along for the ride. Join us in following the adventures of The Wandering Can!